Fear of the Abyss and Other Tales From the Edge

Fear of the Abyss and Other Tales From the Edge

The new book is up for sale dear and loyal readers. I know you’ve been waiting for a new post for awhile, and I have lots of great exuses that I’m happy to share. The first is that I’ve been busy with this story. It’s a sci-fi story that I think you will enjoy. It’s called “Andrew and the Better Mouse Trap”. It comes from a place of my husband on a crazy mouse trapping spree after our recent mouse infestation. It was a harrowing experience for us in some ways. But it made for a good story and now a great novel idea which I wish I’d thought of before NaNo this year.

Now for excuse number 2. NaNo. For those of you who have been living in a cave without my blog for company, NaNo is National Novel Writing Month. It is a crazy and insane dash to write 50,000 in 30 days. It’s insane. It’s crazy. It’s a mad dash. It’s also what started me back on this road to writing. I’m extremely grateful to NaNo for this. I’m also very grateful to the writing group that I met through NaNo. They put up with me and encouraged me and put up with my WTF’s on their own works and rarely marked my own as such. They gave me a sense of identity that was different than being Wee Geek’s Mom. I didn’t know how to be anything but Wee Geek’s Mom. There I was just a little Autistic Zombie Girl. This was in the days before the AZG brand, too (such that it is). I know this is turning into a love letter to my new identity. You’ll have to allow me to gush for a few more minutes. So you can skip to the next paragraph if you don’t want to read the gushing. It’s very hard for people who haven’t been through what Wee Geek and I have to understand how much the entire thing damaged every part of our lives. For me it robbed me of the only identity I’d allowed myself to have. It’s amazing to think about now. Now that I am beginning to build the AZG brand and I’m getting pretty excited about that. It’s a good feeling that I have something that is all me. No matter what. Losing Wee Geek or the former BB guy cannot alter it. It’ll prolly just add material to the bonfire. I am enjoying this time in my life. Even though I’m anxious to get to the part where I can think about writing full time.

I have also been busy just trying to be creative for my day job. Which is a hard uphill battle some days. I have a wonderful assistant that is very helpful and works very hard for what little she gets in compensation for it. I see lots of ironies in my life right now. The least of which is that I’m not writing full time.

One of the ironies is that I still struggle with the social parts of my life. I’m constantly worrying and obsessing over all these details that I know neurotypical people don’t struggle with. I know that they don’t have to worry about people taking something that they say the wrong way because they rarely do that. They don’t have to worry that everytime their voice goes unmodulated that someone is going to think it’s too harsh or too something. I know all of these things and I have to think about them all of the time. It makes it difficult to get much else done.

Wee Geek is doing well in a new full time job, making better money, and feeling more settled overall. This makes me happy. I like to see him doing better and feeling better overall. I’m very proud of him. He struggles with people in his life, still, but he also asks for help and advice much more. He is tired most of the time, but it keeps him busy and keeps him from being angry at his circumstances.

Speaking of his circumstances, we have found out that my ex’s lawyer is $186,000 in debt to the IRS. Apparently while she’s shaking down poor preschool teachers, she’s not paying taxes on the proceeds. Now that she’s been elected Judge Head of the Filth Pile, you’d think someone would be investigating it. But they aren’t. It seems as if it’s all been let fall to the wayside. I wonder why corrupt and awful people are allowed to get away with these things. She and my ex deserve each other.

I am beginning to comtemplate what is next in my life. I have some ideas, but am uncertain what direction that I want to go in. I keep looking at th options and wondering what road to take.