I’m not very much calmer about this entire court situation than I was yesterday, however, my brain is now able to wrap around the fact that I am getting fully, completely, totally and most decidely screwed.  Now, that I have accepted that, I can move on slightly.  It’s not easy to move on from this.

I’ve partially digested the paperwork….it’s going to take a while before I can completely digest it, but I’m working on it.  I think the thing that I find the most laughable is that they say that the child support is so high because I do not choose to exercise parenting time!  I’ve never even been given the option!  How ridiculous is it that they are allowed to just say anything that they want in court paperwork and it suddenly becomes true!  How ridiculous it is that my ex is allowed to out and out lie in court and it suddenly becomes true!  It’s a little scary.  I think the scariest thing is that they lie and the judge doesn’t seem to get it at all.

So, what to do about all of this?   I’ve waited 3 years for Wee Geek to be 18 and it still doesn’t make any difference.  That’s the worst part for me. That I waited and I’m still waiting.  I am just wondering when it will stop but fear and know in my heart that it will never stop until I’m dead.  Scott will not be happy until he either has killed me himself or I’m in a grave because of all of this stress.  How much stress is one person supposed to be able to handle in one lifetime?  I’ve had all mine in the last three years, thank you.  No more stress is allowed in my life.  EVER!!!!!

You know, I think the other most disturbing thing is that they seem to understand perfectly well how all of this is affecting me and they continue and they make it worse.  His church is condoning his bad behaviour, the judge is condoning his bad behaviour, his wife is condoning his bad behaviour.  The operable concept here being that Scott is never punished for being the arrogant asshole bastard that he truly is!  Truly, if it wasn’t happening to me, I wouldn’t even believe it!

So, I’m still puzzling over this problem with the ACLU.  Truly, they think that the judge is a problem, but tell me that there’s nothing that can be done?  How stupid!

I am so frustrated with this system and the unfairness of it that I could just scream 24 hours a day!

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